will i wake in a few hours
in the bright, clean morning
to find you gone
into your own head

i think I told you before
using up all the hot water
makes for a hating

“Whatever you want to call it, positive thinking, re-framing, self-encouragement, ra-ra-rah, this is where you need to step up to the plate, look at your fear head on and confront it with your truth. The truth being, that you manage to get through everyday whether with grace or grit; that fear will not kill you; that your God, or your friends, or your grandma in heaven will have your back; that you have risen above before, and that you will rise above again; that, it’s only life after all.”

- Danielle LaPorte from “your friend, anxiety”

this new tube
of peppermint toothpaste
will erase you
when I’m ready

love,
we marched all night
and all night and all night
and in the morning
there were three

alisha, i tried calling you
i left your movies
on your front porch

I just want to
Make
Love
and Die.

Blake Talks about His Pilgrimage on the Radio Today

A great interview with me on one of my favorite shows on WCOM 103.5 FM in Carrboro, Claudio’s Speakeasy and Radio Theatre Hour. Good friend Claudio invited me on the show again to talk about my recent personal pilgrimage across the country.

The first time I was on Claudio’s show for an interview was 9-21-10 – here:

 

Inmate

I am that inmate
locked in here with you
who’s been on the other side

most of us in here jive about our freedom
when we finally get to the outside
but most of us can’t bear a full breath of that burning air
i am not the most clever
nor do i know the way
they only left clues
said i gotta dig for myself

so i am that inmate who will keep clawing
at the flesh of this beast

and the one who sees naught but the light
who will burden punishment no longer
who has dug through the floor with the rustiest of spoons
who has sliced through his hands repeatedly on the violent barbed fences
who has stolen the sweat-soaked uniform of a pitiless guard
who has dodged the hating bullets from the towers
who has run mad across fiery cotton fields chased by frothing dogs
who has hidden up in a musty broom closet for 3 days til the grip unclenched
who has spent a month in the merciless void of solitary each try
who gets further and further away

I am just that inmate locked in here with you
who has been on the outside
who knows the ones
who made it out
and won’t ever come back

Will you follow me
Or should I follow you?

The 10 Suggestions

As I was walking in the woods this morning, observing my thoughts, I heard a baseline of “thall shalt nots” behind them. As I observed some admittedly fear-based thoughts, I noticed that there was a “you should not do x” or you will be ‘bad’ or receive some punishment or who knows what else. And with my background in positive psychology and affirmations (and, as a child, my mother’s insistence that the subconscious mind does not understand negatives, so only feed it what you want to manifest, not what you don’t want), I began to think I wanted to find the root to those thoughts like “Blake, you should work hard today because you should work hard” and flip into a positive without the should–”Work in a fulfilling way brother Blake.”

Then I thought of the 10 Commandments. First, I hate the sound of “Commandment”. I love the Bible, dont get me wrong, but really only the stuff after JC steps in. Not sure how Jewish folks interpret this stuff, but guilt seems to be a pretty big deal with them too. Shame and Guilt are fed directly by the perception of unmet shoulds. Quote it.

Anyways, I thought I would spend the morning making the 10 COMMANDMENTS a bit more to my liking. A bit more life-affirming. A bit more like suggestions on how to live a good life. If you don’t follow them, so what? It’s only going to be a hellish experience to be alive, this time around.

1. “I am the LORD your God who brought you out of the land of Egypt, from the house of slavery. You shall have no other gods in My presence…”
Keep the mind free of distraction, so that you can see the sacredness and unity of everything!

2.  ”Do not make an image or any likeness of what is in the heavens above…”
Worship the spirit and the awesome direct experience of the divine rather than any thing, but also see that The Spirit is IN every thing!

3. “Do not swear falsely by the name of the LORD…
Be honest with yourself and others, and act with that integrity! 

4. “Remember [zachor] the Sabbath day and keep it holy”
Rest for a day (or more) a week (take naps too), and make that your holy day of connection with yourself and the divine within.

5. “Honor your father and your mother…”
Honor your father and you mother, grandparents, ancestors and your whole family and lineage, and also honor the Masculine and Feminine energies within everything. 

6. “Do not murder”
Respect life and your and others’ right to live it, and let your compassion and love for others blossom as you see that everyone wants to live and be happy!

7. “Do not commit adultery.”
Act with honor by honoring your commitments and honoring other’s commitments! 

8. “Do not steal.”
What you have is enough! And what you must have will be given or you will earn! 

9. ”Do not bear false witness against your neighbor”
Always promote the goodness in others! Even when wronged, strive to see the goodness/divinity within yourself and other, and your compassion can only grow!

10. “Do not covet your neighbor’s wife”
Treat sex as sacred, and treat other people as sacred too!